In one of the more surprising stories this week, it’s being reported that the much-anticipated sequel to 2009’s GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra is being pushed back a whole nine months to March 29th of next year so 3D can be added. In other words, they’re moving it back a few months so they can make more money with a spring release. In fact, Paramount Execs are so upfront about said money-making, that one of them released a statement saying, “We’re going to do a conscientious 3D job because we’ve seen how it can better box office internationally.” I rest my case. [Ed. – It’s better than pushing it back for ‘reshoots’, which is almost always a sign of a shit movie…]
We took a look at the upcoming Smallville replacement Arrow, which focuses on Oliver Queen AKA Green Arrow. You can check out all the details and our first look at Stephen Amell as Ollie here. It wasn’t long after that Arrow moved from the pilot stage with a season order of episodes. And it wasn’t too long after that we got the first clip and the trailer. And by not long after I mean not long ago. As in it just happened. So…
A couple weeks ago we showed you 2 trailers for the impending second season of Femme Fatales, which premieres tonight on Cinemax. So to get everyone ready, we’ve got some more stuff now. This includes a sneak peak and several interviews with some of the people involved, including such beauties as Nikki Griffin and Madison Dylan. Check it out, and then watch the show tonight. Also, a lot of people who have HBO may also have Cinemax and not even know about it, so double check.
I have always been a fan of science fiction. I love futuristic films, and I have always appreciated a good original story. In March, I saw a short film called Thieves. This film can only be described as a thought-provoking cyberpunk thriller. It is rare to see a 14-minute long piece of art and crave so much more. As it ended, I wished that I was a wealthy woman, and could fund a full-length film. The reasons I would like the world to see this fourteen minute mindf*** are plentiful.
I cannot stress to you enough how much I despise spoilers, especially for works with such a small amount of tangible content. This is why I must not reveal much about the plot. In a futuristic world of New Detroit, there is a condemned building. The movie begins with an interrogation between Jason Arthur (Sheldon Simmons) and Butterfly Agent Janice Monroe (Kelly Kirstein). Also in the room, the Extractor (Didrik Davis), bodyguard to Janice.
It’s time for my favorite part of the year. What time is that you might ask? Well, it’s the time of year when we get the previews for all the summer and fall movies coming out for the year. But why do you get excited just for summer and fall movies, you might ask? Well, simply put, they’re just better. Summer films are meant to entertain, while the fall fare is all Oscar bait and leftover blockbusters that didn’t make the cut so you’re either getting A-grade quality or C-grade cheesiness, both of which are very enjoyable.
In this edition of Trailer Roundup, trailers for what might win Best Picture at the Oscars or Worst Picture at the Razzies will share the stage to be consumed for your film-going pleasures.
The Watch (RedBand)
Formerly known as Neighborhood Watch, the film has gone through some major marketing changes due to some recent current events. The film follows an ‘urbanite’ who moves to a new community and joins the Neighborhood Watch, who soon find out that they are in the midst of an alien invasion. It looked hilarious back before the marketing switch, and it looks even better now that they are focusing on the aliens. – SupaScoot
Stars: Ben Stiller, Vince Vaughn, Jonah Hill, Richard Ayoade, Billy Crudup, Rosemarie DeWitt, Will Forte, and R. Lee Ermey
Release Date: July 27, 2012
Bait
In this R-rated gorefest from unknown director Kimble Rendall, Bait 3D follows a group of tsunami survivors who are trapped in a supermarket. And not because of the water. No, there’s a 12-foot killer shark lurking in the surrounding waters, and the only chance of survival they have is waiting for the water levels to die down. Does this sound stupid? Yes. Is the trailer stupid? Yes. But is it going to be a shark-filled, gore-filled, dead-person-filled, cheesy-dialouge-filled piece of awesome shit? Absolutely.
Stars: Phoebe Tonkin, Alex Russell, Xavier Samuel, Julian McMahon, Sharni Vinson, Cariba Heine, and Lincoln Lewis
Release Date: September 6th, 2012
Argo
I think we can all agree that Ben Affleck is a better director than he is an actor. So his newest film, which he directed I might add, looks pretty great. I love movies about movies, and that’s what Argo is… kind of. According to IMDb: As the Iranian revolution reaches a boiling point, a CIA ‘exfiltration’ specialist concocts a risky plan to free six Americans who have found shelter at the home of the Canadian ambassador. That risky plan you might ask? Make a fake movie. Argo looks to be the most entertaining war story of the year.
Stars: Ben Affleck, Alan Arkin, John Goodman, Michael Parks, Chris Messina, Victor Garber, Bryan Cranston, Kyle Chandler, Taylor Schilling, Michael Cassidy, and Clea DuVall
Release Date: October 12th, 2012
The Possession
It seems like we’ve just got the preview for this year’s biggest stinker. Produced by Sam Raimi of all people, The Possession follows a little girl who purchases a mysterious antique box at a local garage sale. Unbeknownst to her, the box is home to a malevolent spirit that possess her body, and it’s up to her parents to stop it. The problem isn’t that it looks poorly made, it just looks so derivative. It’s even “Based on a True Story”. I can’t wait until the day Hollywood runs out of true stories to tell.
Stars: Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Kyra Sedgwick, Madison Davenport, Natasha Calis, Grant Snow, Agam Darshi, Quinn Lord, and (not even joking around here) Matisyahu
Release Date: August 31st, 2012
Killer Joe
Alright, everyone. This is where shit gets serious. Matthew McConaghuey in an NC-17 movie directed by William Friedkin based on a play by Tracy Letts? Count me the hell in. Oh yeah, and the movie co-stars Emile Hirsch and Juno Temple, two of the best young actors working in Hollywood. After accumulating a hefty debt, a young man hires a hit man to kill his evil mother who has a $50,000 life insurance plan on her. Thing is, the hit man is a maniacal wacko who instead accepts the boy’s sister’s hand in marriage instead of monetary payment. Things get a little crazy, apparently.
Stars: Matthew McConaughey, Emile Hirsch, Juno Temple, Gina Gershon, and Thomas Haden Church
Release Date: June 29th, 2o12
Fat Kid Rules The World (RedBand)
In Fat Kid Rules The World, Troy is a morbidly obese and depressed teenager who, after attempting suicide, is saved by street performer and teenage drug addict Marcus. The two form a bond and start a punk band together, bringing Troy both confidence and fame as he realizes his impact on the world. But when Marcus’ drug addiction becomes a problem, it’s up to Troy to help him live to see another day. From the trailer, it seems like this will be a great quirky coming-of-age film that will appeal to all demographics.
Stars: Jacob Wysocki, Matt O’Leary, Billy Campbell, Sean Donovan, Jeffrey Doornbos, Vivan Dugre, Julian Gavilanes, Russell Hodgkinson, and Matthew Lillard
Release Date: TBD
The Host
Stephenie Meyer adaptations have a reputation for being… complete and total shit. Much like the adaptations of Nicholas Sparks, moviegoers appreciate none-too-much the sappiness and artificial fluff that comes with a love triangle between a human and a vampire and a werewolf. So, it’s rather surprising that the teaser trailer for Meyers’ most recent adaptation, The Host, looks halfway not shitty. Starring Saoirse Ronan, the film is about a dystopian future where there is no crime, no hate, and no conflict because of a parasitic alien soul that invades peoples’ bodies… I think.
Stars: Saoirse Ronan, Diane Kruger, William Hurt, Frances Fisher, Max Irons, Jake Abel, Chandler Canterbury, and Scott Lawrence
Release Date: March 29th, 2013
The We and the I
Michel Gondry understands the human condition better than a psychologist, so it’s fitting that he would make a film about a bunch of seniors during their last bus ride home from school. The premise is fascinating and seems to me like a film that would be adapted into a play or vice versa. From the trailer, it seems like the portrayal of these kids is extremely accurate, and I’m quite excited to see how their different personalities play against one another in a film that takes place in such a confined space.
Stars: Meghan Murphy, Alex Barrios, Brandon Diaz, Joe Mele, Lady Chen Carrasco, Patricia Jade Persaud, Jonathan Scott Worrell, and Raymond Rios
Release Date: TBD
Beasts of the Southern Wild
This trailer for the Sundance Film Festival favorite looks to be equal parts The Tree of Life and Where the Wild Things Are, except possibly even more magical than those two combined. The story follows a six-year-old named Hushpuppy who goes in search of her mother after learning of her father’s deteriorating health. Along the way, she meets a fascinating cast of characters who all teach her something about life. To be honest, this is possibly one of the most gorgeous trailers I’ve ever seen and I truly can’t wait to see this film.
Stars: Quvenzhane Wallis, Dwight Henry, Levy Easterly, Marilyn Barbarin, Jonshel Alexander, Kaliana Brower, Joseph Brown, and Nicholas Clark
Release Date: TBD
That does it for this edition of the Trailer Roundup!
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This week’s episode was called “Christmas Waltz” but really could have been called “Hey remember me? I’m a character on Mad Men who hasn’t gotten much attention lately.” as the episode focused on Lane Pryce, the now seldom seen Harry Crane and the recently neglected Joan. There was even an appearance by the once regular character Paul Kinsey who has turned his devotions to Harikrishna.
I must admit I was a bit confused by some of this weeks elements and I’m not sure how much was my own failings, and how much was the complexities of Mad Men and their room of writers. First the episode starts with Lane talking to his British lawyer who informs him that he is in desperate straights financially and needs to come up with $8000, a hefty sum at the time. (More than a top-of-the-line Jaguar {$5600}) I couldn’t quite follow what the money was for (back taxes?), but it’s hardly important, and we see Lane’s desperation to make good on his debts while trying to avoid outright embezzlement. As the bonuses that he has concocted are delayed again and again, Lane finds himself trapped at episode’s end having already forged Don’s name for a check he now shouldn’t have had for another month. It will be interesting to see how this develops. Will Don ultimately be more upset that Pryce acted criminally desperate or that his British pride kept him from telling Don the truth of the matter and ask for help? I would expect the latter. This week’s next ultimately unimportant confusion for me was Don and Joan’s “Ali Khan” reference. Don has rescued Joan from the office after she has been officially “served” by her douchebag husband. After cutting a check for a brand new Jaguar to tool around in, Don and Joan find a bar in which to down a few drinks and wax nostalgic. The whole scene is oddly mixed with the music from the bar being realistically loud in the sense that it’s hard to hear Don and Joan’s conversation very well. What’s clear is their sexual tension but their flirtation is that of two people who know that their time has passed and they have reached a level of mutual respect and admiration for each other right down to Don attempting to set Joan up with the gentleman across the bar. Don, for his trouble, is greeted by an infuriated Megan at home who is just another in line trying to figure out where Don’s motivations are coming from these days. It seems she can handle his love for advertising, but can’t handle his new-found casual attitude towards work much better than Pete Campbell can.
The other major storyline of the week involved the aforementioned Season-Three-Era Crane/Kinsey centered drama. Kinsey’s only real talent apparently is recruiting for the Harikrishnas, something that doesn’t fulfill his soul. We learn that he has been in and out of every ad agency in town and his ultimate dream is settling in with his new love Lakshmi and writing for the up and coming TV serial Star Trek. He has turned to Harry for his television connections and hopes that he can get his script passed on. All of Kinsey’s heart-felt trust in Harry is misplaced as it is Crane who quickly double stabs him in the back. Lakshmi, played by an actress who will one day play the lead role in “The Juliette Lewis Story”, forces her way into Harry’s office in an attempt to sexually and physically blackmail Harry so that Kinsey will remain with the Harikrishnas. Unfortunately for poor Paul Kinsey he is getting played from all sides as Lakshmi only wants him for his recruiting talents and Harry shows his true cowardice by buying away his problems by sending Kinsey away to Los Angeles with false hopes, crushing both his dreams simultaneously.
Next week we should be getting more into the meat and potatoes of the season’s upcoming conclusion as we wait to see what lies in store for SCDP in 1967, and what goes better with steak and mashed than a stiff finger of Scotch?
Grizzly Bomb 